As time becomes kaleidoscopic, I find it unbearable to think too far into my children's future | Delia Falconer

'Stop the world' the musical hero said whenever things went wrong. I've been feeling this way for a few years nowThis is part of a series of essays by Australian writers responding to the challenges of 2020The sense of time-slip begins during the summer megafires. Walking my children home from school in Sydney under a red sun I have the nagging feeling, beneath my anxiety, that I've seen this close orange light before. Then I remember. My father made our family nativity set out of pumpkin-coloured cardboard, topped with a skylight of red acrylic. The sideboard lamp cast the same uncanny glow on to baby Jesus and his shadowless entourage.Three months later, in early March, my partner and I are driving the twins down the south coast through green dairy country to isolate from the coronavirus. "Does the sky seem particularly blue to you?" he asks as we look up the valley. "I'm having a 'severe clear' moment." A dark joke between us: pilots used the term to describe a sky of perfect visibility on the morning of 9/11. With most planes cancelled, there are no bright contrails in the usually busy flight path above the escarpment. The air is alert and tender. It occurs to me that we haven't seen a sky like this since our own childhoods, near the beginning of the Great Acceleration, when the indicators of human activity on the "planetary dashboard" began their upward surge. Continue reading...